Hi, I’m Li. I am a parent-teacher coach, and I'm here to listen! It is my role to help you realize that change is available AND possible to anyone who chooses it! It’s an honor to hear to what you’re going through in your parenting journey, and I'd be happy to hand you donuts, and wine, and do 'cheers' with my cup of coffee.
It is my role to help you chase the Why’s so we can intervene and attend to what our child really needs at each time- whether you're a struggling teacher, a single parent, a misunderstood Dad or an unappreciated Mom.
I beg you to chase the Why’s- why our children misbehave, why we can’t seem to connect, why, after all, we’ve tried and no matter how emotionally invested we are with everything our child is going through, we still 'fail'.
Sometimes we assume that the child doesn’t WANT to cooperate. Again, look through. It’s not so much that they won’t but they can’t. We’ve discussed previously in discipline that part of it is providing necessary skills or alternatives to the misbehavior APART from just setting limits or giving consequences.
Dr Tina Bryson, our beloved psychotherapist, states that if children are falling apart because they can’t, then it means they need skill-building. Help the child understand how he feels about certain things
It’s simple- let’s say you see a child in your class who doesn’t want to cooperate, who keeps doing that same ‘annoying’ thing over and over again, what do you do? It is becoming a horror already to read posts and complaints in various Mom groups in social media where the school just sends the child home, tells the parents the child does not listen or follow, and that he should see a developmental pediatrician, or go to therapy.
This is the reality we have now- not that everyone isn’t equipped, but a lot in the childcare profession seemed to have forgotten the very SACRED duty which is to bring children to learning. To open their minds, reach out and to take everyone on board. To believe in every child’s goodness.
Is it the workload? The salary we get? The exploding class size? The difficulty of finding balance with work, family, and our social life?
Whatever it is, be there, be present and in the moment with what your child is doing.
Check if the child cannot express her feelings. Then hold her, tell her you’re there while she goes through those big emotions.
She really can’t follow the instructions and starts acting up? Then she needs skill building. Patiently teach her and guide her.
She simply doesn’t want to do something? Make a deal with her, no need to say, ‘No, do it now!’. Agree on something, set your limits and be consistent.
Again, if it’s a WON’T (do it), then go back to chasing the WHY’s.